Why Every Brand Needs a Sex Tape

by Chris Denson

Celebrity sex tapes have become a staple of success in pop culture. From Paris Hilton to Ray-J to Pamela Anderson, Kim Kardashian, Verne Troyer (aka “Mini-Me”) and everyone in between (no pun intended). It’s almost like you’re nobody until somebody _____s you on camera. Although it’s a sad state of affairs, there is definitely something to be learned from the sex tape play book. Here are a few golden points to take with you on your branding journey.
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1.) Make Your Privacy Public. Everyone loves an inside sneak peek. Granted you don’t want to show everything you’ve got, but you do want to give your audience a little more than what they bargained for. “How To’s” and “DIY” are extremely popular sources of interactivity on line or even at a live event. Sharing a secret or two doesn’t give away the foundations of your business to the masses. Instead, the snippet only proves you to be an authority in what you do best. Just as the sex tapes are never fully lit and often don’t give you the full gambit of skill level, your brand’s sex tape should leave your audience wanting to see more of you.

2.) Always Do Your Best. If your corporate sex tape lacks the skill and polish your audience has come to expect, you’ll leave them disappointed and they are much less likely to come back for more. Although you’re giving a piece away for free, quality still comes first. If by chance the production resources are lacking, learn to play to it. You have to admit, there is something oddly intriguing and creative about “night vision.” On the other side of the token, a 90 minute feature projected that way will drive you up the wall. Know your intention and be empathic to your audience. The information you present and how you present it should be reflective of your brand’s integrity and consumer understanding.

3.) Know Your Partners. Celebrities constantly claim they don’t know how these “cut scenes” get out into the world. For now we’ll just call this the Deliberate Accident. It’s also the way viral marketing and word of mouth work. Find the right partners who will help you trickle your message down to their audiences and sit back and watch the waves of interest come your way. Notice we said the “right” partners. Just because a company or individual is “cool” or well respected doesn’t mean it’s the right one for your brand’s image. Be thorough, and be deliberate.

4.) For Pete’s Sake, Have A Story! The key here is to not leave your audience with a what-the-heck-was-that experience. There’s nothing worse than watching your favorite sex tape celebrity wander aimlessly, fumbling around in a dark room. Find your story, stick to it, and tell it well – and maybe even offer a special incentive or surprise ending for sticking around. You want your audience to be familiar with what their experience will be like – and delivered through a medium that speaks best to them. Any thing else is icing – if done well. If there’s no need for your brand to have a Facebook page, then don’t have one. Otherwise you’ll look silly. Learn to make the experience polished, deliberate and valuable. The idea is really to give the consumer a good show every time, and continually up the ante on your own abilities.

5.) Don’t Fake It. Everyone will know. Consumers are becoming wiser and wiser and have a propensity for knowing when they’re being duped. Be authentic. Be true to who you are and what you represent. There’s no need to do cart wheels and yell and scream, if that doesn’t come from a place of authenticity. If you’re sensual, be sensual. If you’re fun, be fun. If you’re political, be political. Keep your imaging and interaction as a mirror of who you are as a brand.

6.) Too Much of a Good Thing. Notice how there is very rarely, if ever, a celebrity sex tape “Part II.” At the end of the day, those who give too much of their goods away end up alone, broke, unhappy, or with some form of offspring they didn’t intend (remember Pepsi Clear?). It’s why Gilligan was always Gilligan. Sure it was a successful run, but did he get very many acting roles after that? None too memorable. The point here is not to beat your good thing into the ground. People will get tired of it, and they’ll get tired of you. Kenny Rogers said it best. “Count your money while you’re sitting at the table… Know when to walk away, know when to run.” That’s how we grow. The world is abundant, and success can be had many times over… but you have to pay attention.

Keep in mind this “sex tape” of yours is in no way literal. At least we hope not. It can be anything. A video. A promotion. A web series. An event. The choice is yours. Whatever you do, do it well.



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